Look, I don’t really follow this reality television and I definitely don’t follow Jon & Kate Plus 8, but I’ve been listening to this debacle of a relationship that they’re involved in through the media. As most of you know, I don’t like the media because they’re annoying, but I do like quotes from people in the news. Since these two are in the news, I read an article about them the other day posted on FOXNews.com. I found this stuff interesting from the article:
Apparently trying to explain what went wrong, Jon said, “I was too passive. I just let her rule the roost and do whatever she wanted to do, and went along with everything, and now I finally stood up on my own two feet, and I’m proud of myself.”
And then this one from Kate:
Rather, they attributed the failure of their marriage to difficulties in communication. “Jon has a lot of anger towards me, and I would love to discuss it with him, and he won’t talk to me,” said Kate, adding, “I don’t know he knows what he wants.”
And then this final piece from Jon:
“I wasn’t always the greatest communicator,” Jon said. “I do have feelings as well….I’m hurt by all of this, but I’m excited and hurt by this at the same time. I have a new chapter in my life. I’m only 32 years old [Kate is 34]. I really don’t know what’s going to happen.”
I could write forever about these quotes, but because I take little-to-no interest in the show, I won’t bother to go to great lengths. Let me tell you what I read out of each of these quotes.
The first quote tells me that this guy Jon felt trapped in his relationship. In the grand scheme of things, the truth is that this guy became the father to a whole bunch of kids at an incredibly young age. In the year 2009, it’s an extreme rarity to find a 32 year old guy with 8 kids. Sure, I want to have a lot of kids, but not at this stage in the game!
The second quote tells me that Kate is a bit out there. Jon doesn’t have anger towards Kate, I think this guy has anger (and a deep anger) to his position in life. Which brings me to the third quote, which, I think, gets us down to the heart of the matter. Jon says, “I have a new chapter in my life. I’m only 32 years old. I really don’t know what’s going to happen.” Let me stress when he says, “I’m only 32 years old.”
That’s right, damn it! The guy is only 32 years old! Look, I’m not saying that 32 year old guys shouldn’t be fathers – in fact I believe that one’s late 20’s into their early 30’s is probably the right time to start a family in today’s society. However, studies continue to show that as time goes on, men want to get married later in life and women want to get married earlier. When I was doing the fraternity advising, I would consistently see guys who were so wrapped up in their girlfriends that they missed out on the “real world” that was going on around them. The sad thing is that after three or four years of being whipped, most of those guys wound up breaking up with their girlfriends and realized, too late, that they were being trapped by the girl because she wanted to be married.
This is what I think happened to Jon. He must have been so wrapped up with Kate that she either convinced him to get married or he thought that if he didn’t get married, she would leave. The guy got married at the age of 22 – that’s VERY YOUNG in today’s world!
In any event, I think you get my stance on this situation. These two had a gigantic family at a very young age and Jon – like most guys in his situation would have done – had to get out of the marriage. It’s probably the healthiest thing to do. The guy never got a chance to date different women in his adult life, he never had the chance to spend quality time with his guy friends, he never even had the chance to be a young adult that wasn’t committed to Kate. That’s what drove the guys insane! If Kate feels there is anger there, it’s because Jon is probably starting to realize all of this for the first time (as he suggests in his first quote). Maybe if they only had 2 or 3 kids, things would be different since he could be more flexible with his time, but 8 kids?! Come on…
I’m sure Jon has been no angel in this situation, but I don’t know what a typical woman’s stance would be. I hope the kids are well taken care of and who knows – maybe after spending a few years being a single guy, Jon will go back to Kate having finally matured enough to the point where he’s ready for a gigantic family.
All I know is that I still won’t watch this show!