1. Pay Your Bill On Time. The biggest aggravation that any small business owner runs into is usually related to finances. To be frank, there are a bunch of customers who just don’t pay their bills. Then, as a small business owner, you’re wedged between a rock and a hard place. Do you charge a late fee and risk aggravating the client or do you stick to the terms of your contract? I say for habitual offenders, you have to charge the late fee. But folks, if you’re working with a small business – pay your damn invoices on time.
2. Not Showing Up To Meetings. In truth, this particular point is what drove me to write this post today (and I’m writing this on Friday, the day before it’ll be on the blog). I was supposed to have a meeting with a new client at 1:00pm today – he didn’t show. This has happened on a few occasions with other potential clients. If people want to know why some small business owners stay away from random inquiries, this is the reason. No one has time in their day to go to a meeting place, sit around for half an hour, and then leave. It’s insulting and probably crosses you off of that small business’ list of future clients.
3. I’m Not Your Tech Guy. My company designs and maintains websites. Nothing gets me aggravated more than when my clients call me and expect me to be able to fix the viruses on their computer. Look – you’re the idiot who either ran over to a porn site or actually clicked a link in the spam e-mail. Besides, my contract is to provide you with website services – not to be your tech guy!
4. You’re Not My Website Company. On a related note, I often get bothered by people who want to plug their limited online expertise into the services that my company performs. I’ll train my clients to work with their websites, but I don’t need you telling me how to do my job. At the same time, I absolutely hate it when small clients (nonprofits or small companies like my own) want websites that are as expansive as organizations 100 times their size. Part of my company’s purpose is to provide an online business for small companies and nonprofits – if you have plans on world domination, that’s fine. Using my company as a stepping stone in your plans.
5. Your Projects Are Different. Related to the previous point is this one, which comes up more than you would think. I often have clients who do one site with me, love my prices and my services, and then want to come back for another site or two. That’s fine – that’s actually great and it means that I’m doing my job. But when I create a small website for your small company and charge you a small fee, don’t think that when you come back with your website that is going to “rival YouTube” that I’m going to do it for beans. Frankly, I’m not going to do it because this company is my side gig and I’m really only in it to help the small guys out and earn a small profit on the side. I’m not interested in fighting the man or creating a better online profile site than Facebook or MySpace – and if I was, then you’d better damn well be ready to pony up the tens of thousands of dollars it would take to get started on that type of project!

Those are only a few of the aggravations of owning a small business. I post these here mainly for your amusement, but you never know – someone might Google this page one day and get something out of it!

Justin: I wanna read about Adolf Hitler!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joe: Go get Mein Kampf

Justin: But I don’t speak Spanish

Joe: Exactly…

Justin: You wouldn’t deny a request from one of your most loyal visitors, would you?

Joe: I’ll put it in for a future entry

Justin: Define future entry…. as it relates to New Jersey law

Joe: Something before the end of the month

Justin: Hmmmmmm….. I’ll allow it. You’ve got some good leads already. That family has been in the news twice in the last month. Once for the bakery not writing “Happy Birthday Adolf Hitler” on his cake and then now for the kids being taken from the parents

Joe: We’ve been following it here in NJ

Justin: It’s kind of like pharmacists refusing to fill prescriptions for birth control b/c of their beliefs…. except on a much smaller scale

Joe: Kinda – it’s a little bit different in that one act perpetuates the largest mass murderer in modern times and the other act perpetuates a religious belief.

Justin: Yeah. But the central question is: Does the worker have a right to deny the customer something they are ‘entitled’ to? (for lack of a better word)

Joe: Who said they’re entitled to it? Shop-Rite is a privately held company and they denied a client a service – they have a right to do that.

Justin: Well, the customers think they are entitled

Joe: The customers are wrong.

Justin: What I wanna know is why the family couldn’t write it themselves on the cake, lol, it guarantees satisfaction and it’s cheaper! We did it all the time when we were younger

Joe: Because they wanted the media attention

Justin: Yeah, and now the kids have been taken, but the NJCPS said children are never removed unless the have been abused in some manner

Joe: They probably have been abused. If you’re fucked up enough to name your kid Adolf Hitler, you’re probably fucked up enough to stick a finger where it doesn’t belong.

Justin: LOL

Justin: WRITE THAT!

There you go – a conversation about one of the most messed up families on the entire East Coast!

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security. — Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their Public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected, whereby the Legislative Powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

He has obstructed the Administration of Justice by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary Powers.

He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harass our people and eat out their substance.

He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.

He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil Power.

He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:

For quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:

For protecting them, by a mock Trial from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:

For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:

For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:

For depriving us in many cases, of the benefit of Trial by Jury:

For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences:

For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies

For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:

For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

He has plundered our seas, ravaged our coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation, and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & Perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince, whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our British brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these united Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States, that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. — And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

NOW you can go out and enjoy the fireworks!