Meet Danica Wallace and Jeremy Welch. The Ohio couple was arrested Friday after cops spotted them having sex in a car while Wallace’s two small children were in the vehicle’s back seat. According to a Springfield Police Department report, a copy of which you’ll find here, Wallace, 24, was driving a Ford Taurus when she and Welch, 29, “pulled off the roadway to have sex.” When police approached the vehicle, they discovered Wallace, naked from the waist down, astride a similarly pantsless Welch, who was seated in the front passenger seat. Welch, who was “extremely intoxicated,” offered cops a simple explanation for the pair’s conduct: “We got horny and just wanted to fuck!!”

Did you get that? They just wanted to fuck…with their children in the backseat of the car. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!? Click on The Smoking Gun link above to see pictures of these superstars – trust me, you won’t be surprised.

For those of you who haven’t checked out the Mike Judge comedy called Idiocracy yet, I suggest you rent it and watch it this weekend or hey – you can pick up a new copy at Amazon.com for about $5 by clicking the movie’s name above (you can check out my review here). The society described in Idiocracy is EXACTLY what our world is headed towards and ridiculous stories like this one only prove that fact.

They got horny…come on!

The gist of the movie is that sometime in the early 21st Century (now), the dumb people of the world just started procreating like crazy while the smart folks waited because the market was bad, their particular situation was bad, or they just couldn’t “perform” in bed. This led to the acceleration of Darwin’s “survival of the fittest” doctrine, but in favor of the morons and not the smart people.

What does this create? A world full of people who don’t know what to do with their garbage, can’t comprehend anything other than grunts and minimal phrases, and use the equivalent of Gatorade to water their crops (which all – surprisingly – are dead). Throw in a former UFC fighter as President of America and the #1 TV channel being named the “Violence Channel” and you’ve got Mike Judge’s 2505.

I won’t go into the details about how Vince Vaughn is transported from 2005 to 2505 or how he and Maya Rudolph get along in the future, but I will say that this movie is hilarious to anyone who knows a real dumb person. You know the person I’m referencing. The one who goes, “Hey guys, I have a story.” And then proceeds to tell a story that is so God-awfully boring you want to kick him in the shin.

And I hate to say this because I really do admire the jobs that police officers do, but the cops in 2505 are so close to some of the police officers that I know here in 2005 that it’s scary. Thank God my hometown of Roxbury doesn’t have any police like this, which is more than I can say for some of the fools that I had to deal with while I was a college student…

But I digress. With a running time of 84 minutes, Idiocracy is a great movie to watch on a weekend afternoon if you’re looking for a laugh. I recommend it.