Folks, we’re being fleeced and it’s happening right underneath our own noses! A report released by USA Today shows that taxpayers are in the hole for about $59 trillion. That’s more than $516 thousand per household! Damn it! The government spent way more than it earned last year and now we have an even bigger debt than we had before the last fiscal year end.

This is mind-boggling! And it’s not a Republican vs. Democrat thing like a lot of you political extremists hoped it would be. Both parties spend recklessly while saying, “Oh well - it’s only tax dollars. There’s always more where that came from!”

Have the people of this nation forgot that the American Colonies pissed off the British Empire because a tax on TEA?!? Tea! We were charged a penny per box of tea or something and the settlers went ape shit, threw the tea into the Boston Harbor, and gave the British a respective “F You” for their taxes.

Now, I’m never one to say that America’s government is completely wrong and needs to be changed. I am, however, one to say that when something is broke, it is up to the people to fix it. And lucky for us in America, we have the best form of government in the history of man - we just have a lot of the wrong men and women who are running that government right now (Republican and Democrat alike).

It’s high time that the people took over. Men like Newt Gingrich endorses policies that require America to not spend more than it takes it. Men like Bill Clinton made this political feat common during his time as President. There are women like Condi Rice who are wholly committed to maintaining the United States’ status in the world. She is joined by women like Elizabeth Dole and even women like Geraldine Ferraro.

There ARE worthy leaders in this country who do not believe that this type of fleecing of American wealth is necessary, proper, or legal. We need to find these people, put them in office, and let them fix the mess that tax-and-spend liberals and compassionate-but-cash-poor conservatives have given this country.

We need normal politicians!

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End was phenomenal! I highly recommend going out and seeing this movie if you get a chance. Whereas Shrek the Third was way too short for my liking, Pirates of the Caribbean was much longer and filled out (and completed) many of the storylines that we’ve been watching over the last few movies.

I will say, though, that I was unhappy with the resolution give in the movie over William Turner, Davy Jones, and Elizabeth Swan (if I go into it any more than that, it’ll ruin the end of the movie). I’m not sure where they were going with the writing there, but I guess it sets up a fourth and possibly fifth movie. Of course as I recall reading somewhere on the internet, there will be no more Pirates movies. That’s a shame. Anyway, after some Googling and some Wikipedia searching, it turns out that there was a scene cut from the movie that would have explained the somewhat tragic ending a little bit better. As it turns out, things aren’t as bad as they seem when you’re leaving the theater as the curse will eventually be lifted. Also, the scene at the end of the movie after the credits (which I didn’t stay to see) reveals the future for Elizabeth and Will.

After reading this stuff and reading what was left out of the movie, it really should have been left in. I mean it’s vital to the storyline. But, you can take a look on Wikipedia yourself to find out what I mean.

Geoffrey Rush was fantastic in his role as Captain Hector Barbossa - he has perfected that role to the point where I can’t see anyone else ever filling his shoes. The same goes for Johnny Depp and his Captain Jack Sparrow character. Both roles were performed masterfully and it shows on the screen.

Orlando Bloom was much better in his role as William Turner, though I thought the writing for his character was “good” at best. Keira Knightley played Elizabeth very well and did a great job during one scene where she finds out her father’s fate. That was probably the most touching scene in the entire movie, though it was a shame to see her father leave the series in the way that we ultimately figure out it happened.

Given the end of the second movie where James Norrington (played by Jack Davenport) brought in the heart of Davy Jones, I expected more from his character in this movie. I also expected his final scene would be a little bit more than it turned out to be, but I guess it was the best way to get rid of the character without a big, extended storyline (sorry if that ruined his role in the movie for any of you).

All in all, the movie is well worth the money spent on it. Again, I suggest going to see it as soon as you can and be sure to see it in one of the big theaters with the good sound systems. And hey, let me know what you think after you see it!

You know when summer hits Deal, New Jersey when the New Yorkers are keeping you up at all hours of the night. Tonight, we had the first gathering of 10 - 15 year olds outside of our window. The cops were called and the kids dispersed a little after midnight. Completely ridiculous that kids this age are allowed to prowl around town without any supervision.

And even more ridiculous that the Ocean Township Police Department told them to just “go home” when - if they were college students - they would have called in the paddy wagon (don’t laugh, I’ve seen it happen before).

Now, at about 2:30am, there’s no way you can sleep because three and a half blocks away a bunch of the older New Yorkers are having a dance club party such that the bass on their music can be heard blocks away. We just drove by and there were probably 50 people standing OUTSIDE of the house.

Again, I’ve seen college parties in this area get broken up with less than half of that amount of people and the party completely contained to a living room or a basement. This party is taking place outside of a house, on a main road, with music that you can hear more than 3 blocks away…

No paddy wagon, no police, nothing.

Anyone who doesn’t think that there is a preconceived dictate in this town to “go after” college students and “leave the New Yorkers alone” is out of their mind.

And here we go again, with another “fantastic” summer in Deal… Ugh…

If you’ve watched any of the major cable news channels for the last few days, you’ve seen the Elisabeth Hasselback vs. Rosie O’Donnell war on ABC’s The View. In this heated exchange of words, Hasselback broke out of her shell and started verbally abusing Rosie to the point where Rosie literally had no answers for Elisabeth’s questions and resorted to repeating herself and hiding under the cover of crowd noise.

The scene actually became an awkward one to watch at times.

This was all spurred by Rosie’s America-hating comment below:

O’DONNELL: I just want to say something. 655,000 Iraqi civilians are dead. Who are the terrorists?

HASSELBECK: Who are the terrorists?

O’DONNELL: 655,000 Iraqis — I’m saying you have to look, we invaded –

HASSELBECK: Wait, who are you calling terrorists now? Americans?

O’DONNELL: I’m saying if you were in Iraq, and the other country, the United States, the richest in the world, invaded your country and killed 655,000 of your citizens, what would you call us?

This is absolutely disgusting. There is no way that any liberal can spin this “view” that Rosie offered. And quite frankly, that’s even an insult to liberals since no clear thinking American - Republican, Democrat, conservative, or liberal - would EVER equate America’s troops to terrorists. And what makes me even sicker is that Rosie went out of her way to say that she did NOT call our troops terrorists.

Oh come the fuck on you idiot! There is NO WAY you can read that exchange and not come to the conclusion that if Rosie answered her own rhetorical question, she would say that our troops are terrorists. She is a shameful American and a person for our entire country to despise. And I actually liked Rosie and her mania before she decided to become political, but now that she’s obviously citing extremist web sites that use fake facts, she’s useless as an entertainer and a person (the number of civilian dead is about 1/10th of the number that she used).

But there is some justice in all of this crap. At one point during their latest debate, Rosie took the easy way out of future arguments by saying that she would not debate Elisabeth any more and that Elisabeth can spew all of the “Republican crap” that she wanted for the next three weeks. This technique is a constant among extremists who cannot defend their comments - they just claim that they’re done with the debate and insult you on the way out. But, thanks to the wonders of reality (and the fact that Elisabeth finally came out of her shell), Elisabeth fought back and made Rosie look like a fool on national television.

The light at the end of the tunnel? Rosie has decided to leave The View before her contract ends. And for me - a guy who is registered as an independent and who loves his country - I’m glad that this beast is finally off of the air because I couldn’t take hearing her blast my country with fake facts and outrageous insinuations any more.

What a week of television we have had, huh? So far I’d call this “Opposites TV” for a variety of reasons - all of which I hope you’ll understand after reading some ranting below.

It started with the Sopranos building up to their big send off and a good old-fashioned curb kick from Tony Soprano to one of Phil Leotardo’s guys. The teeth all over the floor were worth the cost of the episode alone! By far a great episode of the show, getting back to the roots of the show (which, in case you’ve forgotten, is NOT about the mob, but about Tony Soprano’s family life as the leader of the New Jersey mafia). People tend to forget that, but it was a great episode.

Then we had the amazing Jack Bauer manage to somehow save the day on all fronts with FOX TV’s “24.” This was the first full season of 24 that I watched and though I had some problems with the show like Milo’s completely senseless death and the unnecessary drama in CTU, I really enjoyed this season. It was fun to watch and it was fun to follow around the counter terrorism unit as they saved the day after the first nuke went off in the first or second episode. Good stuff.

And Apollo Anton Ohno won Dancing with the Stars. Great. No one cares.

More importantly, this morning on The View that fat, extremist-controlled socialist Rosie O’Donnell was put into her disgusting, shallow place by Elisabeth Hasselback. You know, I don’t watch that show because it’s an old lady show and it’s on during when I’m working, but the clips that are shown all over the rest of the cable channels that show how ignorant Rosie O’Donnell is…man, it’s enough to make you sick.

This filthy bitch said that the American government was behind 9/11 and that our troops in Iraq were terrorists. It’s sick and she’s a stupid, ignorant bitch for even spouting that on the air. And hey - Don Imus said “nappy-headed hoes” on a poorly rated radio show and he gets tossed off the air. This beast says that American troops are terrorists and the stupid yentas in the crowd cheer.

What the fuck is wrong with ABC Television keeping this beast on the air? This is the beginning of Opposites TV - what is actually happening is exactly the opposite of what you would expect. Though I will admit it was good television to watch Rosie put in her place - too bad she’s too dense to have any of this sink in.

Then you have FOX’s American Idol where everyone who listens to any of the popular media knew that Jordin Sparks was going to be Blake Lewis as far back as 2 weeks ago. No, it wasn’t a prediction that just came true. It was a leak in the American Idol camp that let the cat out of the bag - the call-in results don’t mean anything! That’s right, folks - your votes mean dick because the producers have the right to disqualify votes that they feel are egregious as well as votes that THEY FEEL are coming from the same source too many times.

So your little sons and daughters that are calling to support their favorite idol? Doesn’t mean anything. Yet again - the opposite of what you’ve been told and hence a member of Opposite TV.

Then - we have the season finale of Lost. We were promised that this episode would give us some insight into what happens on the island and set the course for the next three seasons. We were also told that we would find out about the end of the series with this finale. And you know what? They were sorta right this time.

The problem with Lost, though, was that the hour and fifty eight minutes before the last two minutes were brutal to watch. I mean you had a few high spots here and there and a few deaths (all of which we either knew were coming or could have guessed with near-certainty were coming), but by and large the episode absolutely sucked. Sure, we find out that they DO get off of the island and that Jack becomes a disaster while Kate seems to look decent in the future, but good gracious - what a mess it was to get to that point!

ABC television really needs to consider speeding up these Lost episodes. I know there are three seasons left - but it might be best for everyone (including the legacy of the show) if the sped that up to about a season and a half. At this point it’s just dragging out way too much.

So there is your look at Opposite TV - some good, some bad, some pathetic.

Last night I decided to go to the movies to see Shrek the Third - the latest in the Shrek saga (by the way, Shrek 4 is already in pre-production according to IMDB). I was pleased with this movie and there were parts where I literally laughed out loud, but at the end of the movie, not only was I struck by how short it was, but I felt like a lot of the story was missing.

Don’t get me wrong - I recommend going to see this movie for Eric Idle’s performance as Merlin alone. However, for a film with a running time of some 84 or 85 minutes (at least 10 of which are credits at the end), I was just left with a feeling like I saw bits and pieces of a larger movie. Case in point - Shrek, Donkey, and Puss go to retrieve Arthur (played by Justin Timberlake) from high school. There are a ton of laughs in this scene including the complete dorks who are playing dungeons and dragons and the one kid who gets a nosebleed just by laughing. Hilarious!

But Artie is whisked away so quickly from the school that you’re left feeling like something bigger was supposed to happen). Another case in point - the fairy tale villains take over Far, Far Away and without seeing how it happens, the next time we return to the kingdom, it’s rundown and decrepit. There was probably a good story there that we didn’t get to see.

I also think that the voice cast of Shrek the Third was quite an ensemble of performers! From Julie Andrews to Cameron Diaz to Cheri Oteri, Maya Rudolph, Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, John Cleese, and so many more (Timberlake, Banderas, Idle, Phoeler, King, Philbin, etc) - this is just an amazing group of people to come together for the movie! My only issue is that there are so many great performances by each of these folks, you’re sometimes left with thinking that they’re not getting enough face (voice?) time.

And one more plot hole that seems to be an issue with me - Julie Andrews plays the Queen of Far, Far Away. When her husband croaks (had to, sorry), wouldn’t she continue as ruler of the kingdom? That wasn’t quite clear to me at all.

All in all, this is a fun movie with some great scenes that’ll have you laughing out loud. I especially liked the scene where Snow White gathered her woodland friends to her with her singing and then starting singing a rock song to have them attack the bad trees. Absolutely hilarious! I recommend going to see it, but if you don’t have the time - that’s okay; you can rent this on DVD when it comes out.

Finally, the Democrats have given up on including a timeline in their Iraq War funding bill. They made their case - clearly - against staying in Iraq and the bulk of their corpus was elected specifically because of Americans’ discontent with the way the war was going. However, funding the troops is the right thing to do from a public policy perspective.

Again, I’m the first one to congratulate the Democrats on their victory in the 2006 elections. Those elections were exactly what they should have been - the American people making their feelings towards an overwhelming policy known. This is exactly how public policy is supposed to work down to the very details. What is not, however, part of those details is the way some Democratic leaders are deriding the funding bill. From today’s New York Times:

“There has been a lot of tough talk from members of Congress about wanting to end this war, but it looks like the desire for political comfort won out over real action,” said Senator Russell D. Feingold, Democrat of Wisconsin, who was unsuccessful last week in his push for a withdrawal of combat troops by spring. “Congress should have stood strong, acknowledged the will of the American people, and insisted on a bill requiring a real change of course in Iraq.”

With all due respect, that’s just wrong, Senator Feingold. Congress “holding strong” to a course of action that would have detrimental effects on our troops in action would be the exact wrong way to go about this bill. The best thing that the Democrats and anyone who voted for them could have asked for was the House of Representatives passing the bill that included a withdrawal timeline. That was their mission - to represent the people. They did that job admirably.

But that doesn’t mean that our troops should suffer the consequences of those who do not understand the basic concept of public policy. That’s just not fair to the men and women who volunteer to defend our country.

This is another old e-mail that I’m purging…

25 Ways To Confuse Your Professors

1. Brush your teeth during class. While doing so, raise your hand as if you have a question, and mumble your question incoherently while brushing, spewing toothpaste all over the place. If your professor objects to your actions, go on a tirade about proper oral hygiene.

2. Sit way at the back of the room, up against the wall, to get as far away from your professor as possible. While he/she is lecturing, shout out things like, “What!?” and “Speak up! You’re mumbling!” If your professor advises you to sit closer to the front, tell him/her you can’t because you’re scouting the room for “assassins.”

3. If you have an early morning class, get there before anyone else, and bring a pillow, some blankets, an air mattress, and an alarm clock. Wear your pajamas. Lie down on the air mattress with the pillow and the blankets and act like you’re asleep. Have the alarm set for about two minutes into class. When it goes off, preferably very loudly, hit the “snooze” button and go back to sleep. Keep doing so for the duration of the class.

4. Dispute everything your professor says, no matter how simple. Try to get him/her to “prove” everything to you. Rant and rave about what a big liar your professor is. Yell at students who are taking notes, saying, “Stop writing down all these lies!”

5. Show up to class about ten minutes late. Ride into the room on a bicycle, yell, “Look out!”, and crash into the blackboard. Get up, take a seat, and act like nothing happened. Do this every day.

6. Keep “accidentally” setting fires at your desk. Burn notebooks, papers, or whatever you have handy. Whenever you start a fire, no matter how small it is, start yelling, “Fire! Fire!” and run out of the room in a panic. Don’t return for the rest of class.

7. Hide somewhere inside the classroom. Wait for your professor to take attendance. Don’t come out when he/she calls your name. Halfway through class, jump out and yell, “Just kidding! I’m here! Fooled you again!” Sit down and be quiet for the rest of class.

8. Wrap yourself in bandages and come to class in a wheelchair. Throughout class, cry a lot and moan things like, “Why me?” and “Please kill me!” Get up during class, like your going to miraculously start walking. Instead, fall down, cry out in pain, and wait for someone to help you back up. When class is over, say, “I feel better now,” leap up, and run home.

9. Come to class with a jar full of angry hornets. Five minutes into class, release the hornets, scream, and run away.

10. Bring a vacuum to class. Halfway through class, stand up and start using it. If your professor objects, explain that you “can’t stand sitting in this pigsty any longer.” Keep vacuuming, grumbling angrily.

11. Bring a small cactus to class with you. Raise your hand, and when you’re called on, say that the cactus has a question. Turn and look at the cactus, as if you’re waiting for it to say something. After a few moments, shrug, and wait for your professor to move on. Do this once a day, and become increasingly irritated with the cactus every time, sighing heavily and giving it evil looks when it fails to “speak.” When you leave the room after class, start yelling at the cactus, “I can’t believe you embarrassed me AGAIN….”

12. Every time your professor stutters, do a shot. If he/she objects, explain that drinking games make the class more interesting.

13. When your professor gives you a syllabus, take it home, correct it, give it a grade, and return it to the professor. Demand extra credit.

14. Come to class every day wearing scary Halloween masks. Try to get your professor to guess who you are. Shoot him/her with a water pistol, scream, and run around the room knocking things over. Say, “Pretty scary, huh?”

15. Get the whole class to show up a few minutes early, and throw a surprise party for your professor. Insist that you can’t start class until he/she has a piece of cake. Keep asking people when the strippers are going to arrive.

16. Instead of taking notes, do an abstract painting during every class. Call the paintings things like, “Professor Acting Like Mr. Know-It-All” or “An Idiot Who Doesn’t Know What The Hell He’s Talking About.” Give the paintings to your professor as gifts.

17. Wait for your professor to mention a date, and then yell out, “Bingo!” Apologize, and explain that you got confused.

18. Carve a bust of your professor out of cheese. Tie a ribbon around it, and present it to him/her at the beginning of class. Demand extra credit.

19. Write your professor a note that says, “I’m going to be about 15 minutes late. Go ahead and start without me.” Wait outside the building until the time when class is supposed to begin. Tie the note to a rock, and throw it through the window.

20. Write down everything that your professor says, word for word. Think up a melody, and turn the words into a song. Bring a guitar to class and perform the song for the class. Explain to your professor that he/she is “very inspiring.”

21. Get a monkey, and bring it to class with you. Tell your professor that you’ve hired the monkey to take notes for you. Sit back and relax during class, letting the monkey scribble on a piece of paper. When it comes time to write a paper or take a test, write down things like, “I wish I had a banana” and “I miss my tire swing.” Assuming you get a bad grade, angrily fire the monkey in front of your professor.

22. When you have to write a paper, get it done early and mail it to your professor’s house. From then on, don’t hand anything in, and blame it on the sluggishness of the U.S. Postal Service.

23. Tell your professor that you’d like to interview him/her for a writing class. Get him/her to tell you his/her life story. Act interested, and write down everything he/she says. Fabricate a few romantic interludes and turn your efforts into a trashy romance novel. Make copies for the entire class, and your professor. Demand extra credit.

24. Draw hearts and flowers on the backs of your papers and tests. Next to them, write things like, “You’re the best, even though you suck” and “You’re the worst professor in the world, but I still love you.”

25. Start asking questions in a fake foreign language. Act like your professor is stupid for not being able to understand you. Get other people in the class to start speaking the fake language too, and have frequent discussions during class. Act like you’re really interested in what you’re discussing. If your professor tries to interrupt or stop you, act annoyed and kick his ass

Enjoy!

Some of you may know that I’m looking to buy a home in the Monmouth County area of New Jersey. The house hunting experience has given me a new look on some of the people who buy homes around here - and it’s not a good look at them, either.

The big problem with buying a home in this market is that the sellers are just completely out of their mind in terms of pricing. And if this isn’t obvious by the exorbitant and inflated numbers that they are asking, then it is blatantly apparent due to all of the “for sale” signs that are beginning to accumulate around the county. And honestly, I don’t feel bad for the sellers one bit - they deserve to not sell these properties and they deserve to be stuck with the carrying costs (which probably ruin their budgets).

Through various connections and people I know here and there, I’ve been able to acquire some inside information on some of these houses that I’m looking at. For example, there is a condo that I’m looking at where the owner is asking $300 thousand for it. Seems reasonable, right? The thing has been on the market for months and I couldn’t figure out why. Then I was told what the other units in that development were selling for…wow.

The MOST that someone paid for the other units was $239 thousand (and that was at the height of the real estate boom). This smarmy prick was asking for $60 thousand MORE than what the most expensive unit sold for during the height of the boom - and he’s asking for it after the housing market crashed! What a jerk! And I won’t even get into how the $300 unit isn’t “fully equipped” (no refrigerator) while the $239 unit came with all appliances included. If this doesn’t show you how an idiot tries to sell a house, I don’t know what does!

Stories like this abound in the Monmouth County real estate market. It’s sad because the current owners are literally saturating the market with overpriced real estate. Sure, this creates a huge buyer’s market (and believe me, Monmouth County is becoming a buyer’s market), but in the mean time, you have people who want to buy homes but cannot do so because of the owners’ desire to get a huge return on their investment. Someone needs to tell these people (I’ll do it!) that they missed their chance. Real estate booms come in 10 year cycles, the next one will start in a few years so unless they want to hold on to these properties until then, they better start getting their prices out the stratosphere and start real-world negotiations.

You gotta love Donald Trump. Right after his television show wasn’t added to NBC’s Fall primetime schedule, Trump comes out and says he’s leaving the show to pursue “a major new TV venture.” Oh this guy is a riot!

Unfortunately for him, ratings for The Apprentice really tanked in the last season and they’re just not as good as they were in the first or second season. It’s the television audience - we’re fickle. If we like you today, chances are we’ll be calling for your head tomorrow.

But you gotta love Trump’s ever-the-salesman mentality. He goes out and bashes that fat, gross pig Rosie O’Donnell and constantly harps on the failing ratings for The View even though the ratings for The View are on a huge upswing in comparison to previous years. People called him out for not telling the truth and he claimed that he was the reason their ratings went up! Ha ha ha ha ha!!!

And he’s done the same thing here with the NBC deal by quitting before he was fired. I love it - it’s great to watch. He’s a brilliant man because he’s obsessive of his name and his empire. You have to admire that.